Reading and Writing to Sleep

It's really not that late for a Friday, but after being awakened by a crying baby and a husband leaving for work entirely too early at 4:45 AM... I'm exhausted. During the day I look forward to crawling in my bed and drifting off to a blissful night of rest as if it is something that will actually happen. However, in reality I am a night owl by nature and practice no matter how I schedule myself to fight it, and I have difficulty settling my mind into rest. I've always envied people like my husband who can fall asleep in 15 seconds and wake up refreshed after a 15 minute nap. It takes me 30 minutes to settle into a nap. In fact, the more I try to focus on sleep the more topics surface and permeate my thoughts. I love to analyze, theorize and day dream, but this looming energizes me at night when I desperately want and need sleep. Morning arrives at the same time every day.

I love to read and always have a stack of books on my night stand that I am currently TRULY reading before I go to bed. Maybe reading a good book is a trigger for my brain and in actuality I should start my day with one instead of the latter. I'm currently reading the book Eat, Love Pray by Elizabeth Gilbert. I'm in the beginning or a quarter of the way through and can understand why the book is so popular. She is desperately seeking. However, it's so depressing when I read books about people that become incredibly influential by doing world-recognizing and monumental things such as building schools in Pakistan and Afghanistan or writing an International Bestseller and they do not know Christ as a Savior. In Elizabeth's search for God (so far... I did read a little ahead and a little about her as an author) she completely discredits Christ. Without Christ there is no knowing God, they cannot be separated. I cannot imagine trying to find answers within myself because I know I would be completely and utterly disappointed at the many directions my truth would lead into chaos. Thankfully, I place my faith in a book that reveals God's character and plan so that I can know his Holiness through the sacrifice of Jesus. This book so far is leaving me depressed at thought of someone searching and still not seeing Truth. At least it drives me into deep thought about my faith and the faiths that exist in this world... which then leads to prayer--as it should. Although the deprivation unnerves me, prayer should be my first stop.

On a lighter note... I enjoy her style of writing because she is being honest about who she is and is sharing an adventure too exciting to ignore. I want to transcend through this book and know her. Her raw honesty (to everyone! or anyone that wants to read) in times of despair displays a self-disclosure that would mandate a close friendship upon exposure to its details. Right now she is in Rome... eating. I could be in Rome... eating.

Now when I really need to fall asleep... like it's midnight and I know my bambino will be bright-eyed and wailing for food in 6 more hours, I pick up Jane Austen's Persuasion. It takes serious concentration to figure out what is even going on. I end up exhausted after 4 or 5 pages.

7 months and growing...

Arthur is 7 months today. This is such a sweet age to experience as a mom. I have so many ideals on how to raise him during this phase: I want to teach him a certain level self control (pulling my hair is getting old), creativity by filling his life with personal play time, and lessons through small, everyday tasks. We have introduced signing, and I'm hoping it will pay off in a few more months. For me baby signing is more of a peer pressure (thanks to the Charleston mommies) than something I personally feel strongly about.

The second peer pressure from Charleston mommies is home made baby food! It's a bit time consuming, but at least I know I'm feeding Arthur something I would actually eat too. He loves pears and sweet potatoes. I love that he actually has food preferences at 7 months old. SO cute! Over Christmas I ended up with a 6th case of mastitis from nursing and decided it was time to wean. I know I'm crazy for stopping after the 6th time... I mean after the 3rd, 4th and 5th time I kept thinking, "Oh, I'm sure this is the last time I will ever get it!" Anyway, it has been a bitter sweet transition. Arthur doesn't seem to miss it. We are both better off this way...

Stats for the baby book, as the pediatrician says-- and I don't correct her by saying, "Oh my son doesn't have a baby book"-- for 6 months are: Height, a little over 28 inches and weight, 17'9 lbs. He was 90th percentile in height and 50th in weight.